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Do you kiss on the first date? The Art of Courting as a Blogger

Posted By Darren Rowse 28th of May 2007 Miscellaneous Blog Tips 0 Comments

KissI was recently emailed by a blogger asking me to take a look at their brand new blog. The blog was very new (it only consisted of 3 posts) and it’s purpose was obviously to convert readers into sales of the blogger’s new e-book.

The first three posts on the blog were all fairly strong sales pitches for the e-book and while they made a good case for the book I came away from the blog feeling like a stranger had walked up to me and asked me to give them a kiss.

I strongly believe that blogs can be a great tool for driving sales to products (whether they be tangible ones or e-products) however when attempting to drive sales with a blog a blogger needs to be aware of the way they ‘court’ their readers.

While I’m sure plenty of good relationships do start with a kiss (and more) on the first date – most dating advice experts would argue that if you want to grow a sustainable, ongoing relationship that the best time to take a relationship to the next level physically is when there’s other aspects of a relationship already in place (ie some emotional connection and time spent together getting to know one another).

In a similar way – when you’re trying to sell something (whether it be yourself as an expert, a product, your email newsletter etc) to rush straight to the sales pitch can damage your chances of ‘conversion’ and lead to a premature end to the ‘relationship’ with your reader.

One of the things that I love about blogging is the ability it gives to connect on a deeper level with readers and to form ongoing relationships with them. However this only happens over time and perhaps bloggers need to keep in mind some of the principles of ‘courting’ before going in for the hard sell.

Help your reader to get to know you, build trust, get to know them and show that you’re interested in more than a quick sale and you could just end up with a lasting relationship.

About Darren Rowse
Darren Rowse is the founder and editor of ProBlogger Blog Tips and Digital Photography School. Learn more about him here and connect with him on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn.
  1. Thanks for the advice. I’m in the position of trying to build readership and I’m not selling anything, just offering advice and travel tips for the luxury travel market. I think I did make the newbie mistake some months back of asking someone to link to my site, but they had commented on liking it and said they would keep an eye on it – I probably overreacted out of eagerness and needless to say, they never responded! I know better now… But this is great advice. You have a great way of making this relatively new medium make sense by referring it to relationships we can all understand, business or personal. Thanks for your blog!

  2. I love the analogy. I really did laugh out loud at “I came away from the blog feeling like a stranger had walked up to me and asked me to give them a kiss”.

  3. Writing with rapport: courting your reader…

    I was talking recently about ways that we can write to create rapport with our readers, and, in the longer term to build a relationship of trust. This is linked to the concept of pacing and leading – starting ‘where…

  4. […] Do You Kiss on the First Date? The Art of Courting as a Blogger […]

  5. I don’t know how this works. Pure blogging would just give a pure facade to a person’s character. Still pretty much love face to face. Easier to let go if I can sense it doesn’t work.

    Fara – http://www.pickmeuptoday.com

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