Today’s post by Rob McPhillips of Stress Management and Beyond.
If you knew that your blog was vulnerable to hacking or some similar security breach, would you take the time to secure it?
I ask, because I want to warn you about a greater, yet almost unknown threat to your blog’s growth and success.
That threat is stress and as today is National Stress Awareness day in the U.K, I would like to share with you why I believe how you respond to stress is perhaps the most critical factor in determining the future success of your blog.
We’re all gathered here because we share a common goal. To grow our blogs to be more successful. And what’s at the core of a successful blog, is a Blogger that has developed a high level of skills at;
- Traffic generation
- Community building
- Writing attention getting posts
- And the other tasks involved in a popular blog
Put more bluntly, a Blogger with 100 Readers and averaging 3 comments a week is at an entirely different level of skill and capacity than one with 1 million Readers and 3,000 comments a week. The difference isn’t just luck. If you have the skills and capacity of a successful blogger than success is only a matter of time.
However, in the case of most of us, success is a journey of mastering these skills. That doesn’t mean we are less worthy, less capable or have any less potential, only that we need to develop new skills that we haven’t yet developed. Isn’t this why we read Problogger?
And as any journey involves uncertainty, risks and hazards, so too does our journey to success. In order to grow our blog, we have to grow our skills to a higher level. In the course of this, it is natural that you will experience stress because you are stretching beyond your comfort zone and developing new or refining existing skills.
In fact if you don’t experience stress on a regular basis, then you either don’t care enough about what you are doing or you aren’t coming close to your potential.
Re-framing Stress
Let me give you a new way of looking at stress, that will be more useful in aiding your evolution as a Blogger.
Stress is like the river between two lands. On one side is your current situation. On the other, is the end result that you dream of. If you refuse the risk of getting to the other side, success will forever evade you and you will have to resign yourself to this being as good as it gets. But if you are successful in your attempts, you get to live your dream.
Therefore the key to your success (and that of your blog) is going to be entirely determined by how you respond to stressful challenges.
Every stressful situation is actually an indicator of where you need to upgrade your skills in order to be more successful. You only feel stress because the road to your goal is blocked. And when you are capable of overcoming the block, the stress will dissolve. And you are closer to reaching your goal.
Let me try to make this clearer with some concrete examples. Say your stress seems to be about dealing with negative comments or wondering if your next post will be popular.
Sometimes negative comments or unpopular posts are helpful because they guide us back when we get off-course.
Mostly though, negative comments are just someone who isn’t really our audience reading or someone misunderstanding. Equally unpopular posts are often those too simple or too complicated for our Reader’s level of understanding so that they don’t see the relevance in it.
These only really bother us, when they hit upon something we doubt in ourselves.
What it’s really about is gaining the clarity to know what your purpose is and who the right audience is for you. When you gain conviction and clarity in what you believe and what you are doing, it is like standing a flag in the ground and so the Reader’s that are right for you will gather around it.
If instead, you are all the time only seeking praise and approval from everyone, then there is nothing solid, consistent or certain about your blog and so ultimately it will never gather a sizeable core of die hard fans. Only drive by Readers who scan a post and never look back.
Or maybe, most of your stress comes from having too much to do and too little time to do it in.
In this case, your success depends upon you resolving this conflict. Which ultimately means identifying the critical core tasks, finding more efficient ways to get them done and being capable of doing all that needs to be done.
The Mistake Most People Make In Dealing With Stress
Typically people see stress as an irritation that interrupts them. And so almost all stress management materials are focused on stress relief. Go for a walk, exercise, breathe deeply etc. These are all tactical ways to deal with stress. Which is perfect if you are stuck in the swampland of stress and need to get some perspective. But tactical stress management, in itself will never lead to growth and development.
What if your stress is caused by the problem above, of too much to do and too little time to do it in. Well feeling stressed about it, is only going to make things worse and so you’ll end up running around like a headless chicken and getting nowhere.
Relieving the feeling of stress will be helpful, as it can enable you to look at the situation more clearly.
But the only way of resolving the situation, once and for all, and so growing your blog, is by getting clearer about what should be done and becoming more productive.
So as a Blogger looking to evolve you are really needing to develop your skills at strategic stress management.
What Is Strategic Stress Management?
Say you are struggling for ideas to write original posts. Tactical stress management would try to dull the pain or ease your emotional discomfort about the situation.
Yet the fact that you have a problem bothering you, indicates a deeper problem that it is critical to your success. So changing the way you feel is only part of the problem.
Strategic stress management focuses on identifying what caused the problem and why. In addressing the root core of the problem, you not only overcome the emotional discomfort, but you become a stronger and more evolved person. Which in the case of your blogging leads to a more successful blog.
How can you use this new perspective on stress to grow your blog?
We are as successful as our limits allow us to be. And so as we remove our limitations, we become more successful. Stress is an early warning indicator of a problem, or problems, that will limit you, or your blog, from growing.
- So take a few minutes to think of the most stressful issue in your life.
- Then you need to separate your feelings from the issue. It is getting stuck in strong negative emotions that pulls us into the grip of stress, from where we can see no resolution, which is why many people get great results from coaching and consulting that they cannot achieve alone.
- Now try to identify and analyze what limitation is causing the issue.
- Solve that limitation and your potential for success is much greater.
- Repeat for continual growth.
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Hi Rob,
I know exactly where you’re coming from. A little bit of stress can be a great motivator … but even just a tad bit too much, can also be a great excuse to just shut everything down and procrastinate. Successful people are those who learn to find the right balance.
Beautiful post and Yes ! stressful situations are an indicators of where we need to upgrade our skills….
“The man who doesn’t relax and hoot a few hoots voluntarily, now and then, is in great danger of hooting hoots and standing on his head for the edification of the pathologist and trained nurse, a little later on.” ~Elbert Hubbard…Awesome post thanks for sharing..
Handling stress is one of the biggest issues facing the home worker. Many times I will wander off and do something that has nothing to do with what I should be doing. I have problems with the Should Do items.
Eugene
I always take stress in a positive manner. I take enough stress to keep me motivated and focused. It is also true that without stress certain qualities of people don’t really get tested. Stress is needed to get people, as Rob said, out of their comfort zone.
Also I would slightly disagree with Rob regarding the parameters he seem to be using to measure the success of a blog.
As an example, I would prefer 50 intelligent/quality/relevant comments on my blog by highly relevant people rather than 1000 dumb comments and 1 million visits of an un-targetted and non-relevant audience..
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You inspire me. This is a really helpful article. I am looking forward to read more from you in the future. Thanks for your effort.
Stress is quite a powerful thing. The thing is, many new bloggers are stressed from the economy.
I’d be willing to bet that many people started blogs attempting to make money online while looking for a job. That can be very discouraging since many will likely not even make a few dollars in the first several months.
At least once a week I consider taking up drinking. If I don’t have a stressful day at least one time per week I start to wonder if I’m not challenging myself enough.
The idea of a stress awareness day is kind of funny. If you aren’t aware of stress I want your job.
i have a different kind of stress…but im little more okay..after read this post
thanks
Hey Rob,
Beautiful post I am a teen blogger who does school work for 4 hours then some tutions and after i sit till night 12 o clock writing and promoting my blog. I’m hearing about the stress awareness day for the very first time, i’m looking forward to learn more about it. Guess there is nothing like that in India.
Regards
Vishal Sanjay
http://www.dumblittleblogger.blogspot.com
Great Post Rob.
Almost everyone trying to make money online or run a business online has had stressful moments, but how one deals with the stress determines if they are successful or unsuccessful in the business they are in.
Personally, I get motivated when I am stressed. It only goes to show that I truly care about what I am doing.
I agree. Thanks for the helpful post. However, I believe that negative comments can be used to improve blog or skill. My recent article at http://www.aisajib.com would describe you how that is possible.
Some people thrive on stress. I’m generally not one of them. I guess it’s a good thing I don’t need to depend on my online income.
Great amazing tips as usual! I have done stress management ;) and the one motivates you is the eustress. Stress boosts my ability to do more things efficiently! i know its weird but it works!
Hey Rob,
Most people think of stress as a purely negative thing. However, stress is a great thing – just like with anything else, too much of it is only when it becomes bad.
Stress is like a lighting the fire underneath your feet. It gets you moving. If you had a month to get something done, that’s how long it’ll take you (for most people, anyway).
But you probably want to get more done. Write more articles. Do more marketing. Get closer to finishing your latest project. So setting deadlines for yourself lights the fire under your feet. You give yourself a healthy dose of stress.
You HAVE to get this article done by today. You HAVE to do these marketing tasks in the next 2 days. You HAVE to finish up the next 3 chapters in your book before the weekend.
Healthy stress will simply make that singular moment of creation more intense, leading you to finish your work faster. Procrastination and laziness goes out the window, and effective time usage replaces it.
Great article on a not-usually-covered behind-the-scenes aspect of building your blog. Here’s to utilizing healthy stress and in a strategic manner,
Oleg
@Jaime – I was on the floor laughing when I read that because I keep saying “I’ll start drinking hard booze” on some days.
Actually, I have days that are so insane I just want to “run away from my life”, sell everything and buy a small cabin on an island (any island) and cut myself away from any computer, email, newsletters, outlook reminder of the next appointment and long list of things to do.
I honestly would be loss without a regular fitness regime because when it gets bad, I can just workout all my frustrations.
For instance, last night I went to the gym and I lifted heavier weight than usual and had a really intensive workout.
It made me feel wonderful and I got rid of my stress.
Stress is part of life and it’s surely part of a blogger’s life (since we have so much to do to grow our business and move to the A-blogger list), but the idea is really to manage stress AND not let stress manage you!
@Todd Morris – I have considered shutting down many times and some days I just have no idea “why” I’m doing what I’m doing. When I feel like that I know I need a break to breath and refocus on what’s going right in my professional life.
Krizia
My part on having stress when it comes to managing my blog is when things doesn’t work out the way I want it to be. Well if everything just doesn’t tally and there seems to be dead end, I will just turn away and forget about it, maybe try to rethink of a solution days later.
Good tips, Ironically I seem to be the opposite of most people I know and thrive on stress. I’m also a bit of an adrenaline junkie so if theres an impossible deadline to meet, an emergency server breakdown where seconds count, a weeks worth of work and 2 days to do it in or first on the scene of an accident with lives on the line thats where I’m at my best. I’m the one people call in an emergency.
On the opposite side of that coin though, if I have some easy task with plenty of time to do it in I’m not motivated to even try heh. On any open ended task if I don’t impose my own impossible deadline then it’ll never get done. Like my final computer engineering project, we had 3 months to design and build a compiler for a new computer language on a non standard architecture. I waited till there was 3 days left, pounded gallons of Mt. Dew, wrote 15000 lines of code by hand and got the best grade in the class. Living like that is probably bad for my health, but if I have time to think about something my quality of work suffers.
Scarily enough I am just like Tim in a lot of ways. I am one of those people that thrives on stress and during pressing situations, but if something does NOT stress me or actively engage me, then my motivation is shot. One of the things that actually drew me to creating my own business in search marketing was that I would have a lot of deadlines, a manageable level of stress (since I owned the company), and the ability to drive production as a result of that stress.
I’ve found that I have been motivated by stress ever since my school days though and that I am simply built this way. My wife on the other hand does not handle stress very well at all and when she becomes overly stressed instead of pressing through she often gets frustrated and disgruntled. Weird how people work.
Great article.
Stress definitely gets to me often enough, but every once in a while I’m able to twist it into something good. Thanks for the great post!
But I don’t like being reminded that I am at best a D-List Blogger…
Absolutely wonderful post! We all need to be reminded that stress can be our friend – if we learn to focus it and use it appropriately. Obviously, this applies to all of our lives and not just blogging – although the application to blogging gives food for thought.
It is when I allow the stress to take control of me, rather than my taking control of it, that I am in trouble. Thanks for the reminder.
This post is poorly written and poorly crafted, including a number of grammatical errors. The narrative lacks cohesion, and the author’s main point isn’t clear — something about stress, success and skills.
My takeaways? If you aren’t stressed, you aren’t going to be successful. And if you aren’t successful, you’re probably going to be stressed. Of course, if you are successful, you will be stressed, in which case you should take a breather.
The introductory suggestion that “skills” is what separates a successful blogger from an unsuccessful one is laughable. First of all, how is “success” defined. Second, where does “topic selection” fit in the equation? Writing about celebrities or blogging is going to get a truckload more traffic than writing about engineering bridges.
This post is an unprofessional reflection on the Problogger brand. More vetting and editing in the future please.
“Which ultimately means identifying the critical core tasks, finding more efficient ways to get them done and being capable of doing all that needs to be done.”
This is something I need to focus more on. I work better under a little bit of stress, but lately I have so much to do I am under too much stress.
Stress can be a tool. It is dealing with that stress and using it to improve your life. Good post.
What a great post. I don’t suspect there are many bloggers out there who don’t feel some stress around their blogs, but to use it as a learning tool in the ways you’ve outlined above, and make those changes makes a lot of sense to me.
I’m going to try implementing some of your ideas!
Cheers,
Miche :)
We’ve been conditioned to believe that stress is something we should try to eliminate ASAP without asking why it is happening in the first place; put the upset cart right up and move on without looking for the bent axle.
I agree with looking for the cause rather than quick remedies that keep us cosseted in our comfort zones but also believe stress can make you do wonderful things.
I’m very much like Tim; I thrive on stressful situations and impossible deadlines. It’s thrilling racing against the clock and winning; turns out great content to. Bring on the stress….
This is very interesting! The part that really got to me was about negative comments, they only bother you when you’re already doubting that in yourself.
Well, I don’t worry about negative comments on my blog, the only couple I’ve gotten are from people who think homeschooling is rotten. And that doesn’t bother me.
But in LIFE, negative comments can knock me down for days. I have been exploring this for a couple months and trying to be stronger. A major light just went on! thanks for the therapy :-)
Wow, what a great post – I have been stalling upgrading my blog look for so long and it has got to the stage where the blog I visualize is so not the blog I have – but I am paralyzed by the work of changing it (stressed!!!). I know it will raise the level of my blog which means the whole blog thing will take up more time and energy… This is the first week I wondered if I should stop and rearrange or do I do it in baby steps every day – whatever the reality vs imagined is stalling me and I need to do something other than paralysis. I really needed to read this post maybe it will jumpstart me into action…
I believe Rob McPhillips presents a very good analysis of the difference between strategic stress management and tactital stress management…
I see myself in the category of people who are driven to deliver a good performance by the pressure of an imminent deadline… but depending on that has backfired sometimes because I found that given more time I could have lined up another resource or better references…
Rob says:
“Every stressful situation is actually an indicator of where you need to upgrade your skills in order to be more successful. You only feel stress because the road to your goal is blocked. And when you are capable of overcoming the block, the stress will dissolve. And you are closer to reaching your goal.”
I agree with that premise because I never get tired of learning but time is an important component of becoming
successful, leading to a choice between time and money and outsourcing as the quicker solution…
Thank you Rob, for a thoughtful article…
Fran
I am so inspired by the way you bring the insight into the human condition from your past in the ministry into this very important and timely secular topic. It was exactly what I needed to hear today.
I do better when I remind myself “I don’t have to be perfect.” It allows me to just jump in and do the work.
Amazing!
For a long time I’ve been running away from stress.
This time let me welcome it!
Thanks for the new perspective!
I think stress kills a lot of bloggers especially if they are just starting out. They think that everything is going to happen for them in one day and once they realize that it takes producing consistent content and hard work, they only last a month and automatically stop. This is why most people think that you can’t earn money from blogging because they don’t give it enough time.
i believe that :
some people may be motivated when they are under-pressure
:-)
Hi Rob.
I’m completely stressed at the moment, so thanks for the reminder that it is okay to have stress. so long as I work on the core issue, I’ll move through it.
I do think there are those people, however, that are more relaxed with life in general and can therefore deal with stress better.
My partner is one of those. I am not, although he tends to bury his head in the sand more readily, too. Not a quality I want to nurture in myself, but sometimes I think life would be more of a doddle if I could :-)
@Todd Exactly. The better you are at getting over stress, the higher bandwidth you have and so the more work you can get done in the same amount of time.
@Fatibony Thanks. You’re welcome.
@Eugene Just a thought. Sometimes the reason for procrastination is that the items on your should do list are ones that maybe you really shouldn’t if you examine what you’re really about and where your skills and interests lie.
@Fardeen Just for clarity, I agree and would take quality over quantity. I believe part of managing a blog well is focusing your time on the Reader’s who you are aiming to serve. I’m not measuring success by numbers, but my point is that more popular blogs require a higher workload to manage. It takes more time to attract traffic, moderate comments and get Reader’s involved.
@Jimmy You’re welcome.
@Gabe The main ingredient of stress is caused by reacting to outside factors, which just causes people to jump from the frying pan and into the fire.
@Jaime LOL. Is that drinking as a vocation or a hobby?
@Casey Great point lol. If you aren’t stressed, does awareness of stress make you stressed?
@Nurman You’re welcome
@Vishal Thanks. Tough schedule, but our energy levels and passion are determined by the clarity of our vision. It is not what we do, but how we feel about what we do that determines the quality of our life.
@Free Thanks
@Sajib I agree as Foucault said, ‘it is those that oppose the system that strengthen it’.
@Mike Resolving stress is all about coming to a decision. You don’t need to become an adrenaline junkie, you just need to understand and develop your own style of decision-making process that works for you.
@S Ahsan Thanks
@Oleg Very true.
@Eat I think it’s like the stages of grief. The first stage is denial, where we want it not to be happening to us or to run away.
@sockyee The stress comes from your attachment to the result. Focus on your vision for your blog and let your passion for what you are doing carry you. The results may not come from one post or ten activities, but from the momentum you build from an accumulation of consistent effort.
@Tim and @Matt Some people need more pressure before they care enough about something to act. The reason for this is to do with individual threshold levels in the reticular activating cortex. It’s also the reason why some people are Introverts and some are Extraverts.
@Melanie You’re welcome
@LPC Lol.
@Vicki I agree, but with a slight twist. It’s when you allow what you are doing, i.e. blogging, to control you, rather than be a medium for your expression, that you feel stress. I think with something so technical as blogging, it’s easy to
@Jeffry Fair points. I accept that I will never win awards for Journalism or the structure of my posts.
However I do have an aptitude and ability that seems to be helpful to some people. Therefore, in spite of my clumsy presentation, I believe the message may be of value to some Bloggers.
Success is individually defined and I would not presume to define it for any other individual. However writing for a blog that is aimed at helping people to earn money from their blog, I made the assumption that success will, at least in part, relate to popularity.
The potential and levels of success will be relative, depending as you say on the niche.
If you were solely to determine success by popularity, which I didn’t (I mentioned popularity as being more demanding on your management skills), then wouldn’t topic selection be a skill?
And if skills are not responsible for success, is success then a matter of luck?
@SEO Growth really comes from finding ways of focusing on your core skills. If you look at grocery stores, they really took off when they moved to self service.
@David Very true. We live in a world where people constantly use analgesics in various forms to numb pain, rather than fix the issues.
@Angela You’re welcome.
@Se7en Stress is always at the point we need to make some kind of decision. Once you make the decision you move on. Until the next stalling point.
Sometimes I stress to keep writing weekly new posts and provide my readers something refreshing to read. Other times I feel bad and get behind due to school.
Experiencing stress over your site is an indication that your confidence in what you have to offer has been undermined. It is not up to you to be concerned with how people relate or accept what you have to offer but that you are sincere in your efforts to provide an honest service. With the knowledge that what you provide is true to the needs of the client then your job is done and you can rest assured that that is enough. Cheers!
mark
http://www.backyardbrewer.blogspot.com
http://www.thebackyardbrewer.com
@Fran I think you’ve got to the core of a lot of issues to do with stress. It’s all about defining what is the most effective use of your resources of time, skills, money etc.
@Mikes You’re welcome
@Donny Very true.
@hokya Life is a constant stream of change, we either decay or we grow. Without stretching ourselves we shrivel.
@Christine Very true, we all have different threshold levels. The key to it all, really boils down to understanding and accepting your own style. Stress is natural. It’s only getting stuck in a stressed state that causes problems.
Great post. There’s two ways to deal with stress. Let it eat you up or harness it’s energy.
People in nowadays are usual working under pressure, even know that is harmful to their health, but for $, no better methods.
Hello again Rob.
I’m not sure if it is coincidence or that you checked out my blog via the link here on my previous comment, but despite being a stresshead myself, I have an amusing take on things via Kaz Cookes ‘the little book of stress’. No capitals in the title folks.
I’m not so stressed that my humour has taken leave so I can highly recommend doing, reading or watching something that makes you laugh to relieve the pressure for awhile. I have a number of humorous books on my shelf for just that reason.
It really can take the edge off things.
Thanks again, Rob :-)
I handle pressure very well so most likely it will help my blog to succeed *hopefully*
Amazing post! It always surprises me at how many people want to take short cuts to success. Usually they end up making excuses as why they quit.
I’m guilty of this as well. Looking back on some of my business ventures I found that I gave up just at the very time that I should have actually pressed on and solved the problems that were creating the stress.
I find if I’m stressed, the ways I keep my blog moving along is to write a list of tasks I need to do. Then, I do the ones I least feel like. I believe it’s the stuff we don’t like doing so much, that we do less. Then our blog suffers in that area. So for me, hitting those tasks head-on not only improves my blog, it also takes the stress away of having to get those tasks done. Most often, I find the task was pretty enjoyable once I started it, so making it easier to just do it straight away next time.
Sometimes I stress to keep writing weekly new posts and provide my readers something refreshing to read. Other times I feel bad and get behind due to school.
@Technology Exactly.
@Develeporholic It will certainly help you through the tougher times that will come with growth.
@Hear Sounds like a good solution for you. A lot of stress is based on fear. And most of the things we fear will never happen anyway. There is just this hesitation or procrastination before we get on with something tough or scary.
Hi Rob,
Great article. And what is really inspiring to see from peoples, is that I’m not alone in feeling stressed!
My biggest stress is always trying to do too much and knowing I’ll never get everything done that I should. Sometimes by the time I sit down with WordPress open my mind just goes completely blank with what to do next.
I’ll take your advice and devoice myself from the blog. Take time to get things in perspective until I’ve got a clear sense of what REALLY needs to be done next and then move forward with a clear sense of direction and purpose.
Pat