Editor who almost exclusively reads content on the phone

n/a Published: July 6, 2018
Location
Work can be done remotely
Job Type
Company Type
Small Business

Description

I am looking to find someone (who is probably younger), who almost exclusively consumes (reads) content on the phone, are icons of grammar and spelling, and have a writing style in layman's/conversational English.

  • If you are not always on you phone you will hate and also fail at this gig.
  • If misspelled or grammatically incorrect text does not make your squirm, sweat, or want to strangle the author you are the wrong individual
  • If you don't write like people speak when they meet at Starbucks (layman's English), or if you have EVER used the words "plethora" or "extensive" in your writing or in a resume....EVER...then swipe left and leave your Dockers by the door on your way out!

WAIT! Hold yer horses....that's a pre-qualifier not a job description.....This person must be able to recognize when a story or a paragraph is too big or too long and be able to break it up on the page or or into separate posts so it looks and reads better. They must be able to edit textual content into nice short readable blocks, trim superfluous content into a shorter more concentrated version, and take large content and break it up into smaller stories.

This person CANNOT know my industry well. I DO NOT want anyone intimate with my industry or its practices and tendencies. What I am looking for is just a good editor/writer, able to use humor (irony/sarcasm)

One last note:

If you are offended at the term "old fart", or me referring to you by any other age derogatory remark, like "you crotchety old bag", or find it offensive for me to refer to you as a "grey-haired grouch", you will not like this opportunity.....so click "thumbs-down" you James-Taylor-loving-Archie-Bunker-types!

C'mon you pre-college, college, and wet-behind-the-ears-in-the-workplace-for-10-years-double-thumbed-mobile-texing-superwonders! Where are you???!

Application Instructions

You must send me a sample of your editing with the content "before" and "after" you edited it.

IF YOU DON'T PRACTICALLY EXCLUSIVELY READ EVERYTHING ON YOUR PHONE THIS WONT WORK OUT....IM TELLING YOU....AND I WILL KNOW....
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